I got a (medical) shot yesterday. The nurse asked me how I found the other two previous shots and if there had been any side effects.

I couldn’t remember. We’re talking less than 6 months ago.

In fact, there have been uncountable times when someone’s asked me how my body responded to something in the past and that memory is gone, seemingly never to be recovered again.

I could tell myself my body probably didn’t need to tell me anything, at the time.

Truth is, even if it did, I wasn’t listening.

Feeling numb to happiness, sadness, pain or comfort is not your optimal state.

These days I notice I pressure myself to detect what’s going on in my body. I almost panic when nothing comes. (As if there’s a right answer to these things!)

Well, I can start with stopping doing that right away.

When I am numb, that’s a sign.
When I’m struggling with finding or articulating what I’m feeling (physically or emotionally), that’s a sign.
When I’m aware that I might be sensing something but it’s covered, that’s a sign.

Just keep checking.

I’m waking up. Slowly but surely.

#embodiedlistening #researchyourself